Sunday, January 26, 2014

New Release: The Goblin Market

I've been sitting on this story for a long time--since 2011. Back then the plan was to write an entire book's worth of fairy tale erotica. I'm not going to say this will never happen, but other projects do keep getting in the way.  I'm in the middle of a whole bunch right now: another dragon story, the next Deadly Liaisons, and a few other things. So out of the vaults comes this story. It's had a few edits and is nice. I like it at least.

"Goblin Market" was a poem written by Italian-English poet Christina Rossetti in 1862. She was a pre-feminist writer, though she claimed to be indifferent towards the Suffrage movement. She's known as one of the greatest female poets of the 19th century and may or may not have been a lesbian.

So of course I'm going to re-work her most famous poem into some erotic prose. The original piece definitely has sexual undertones, and the first time I read it I thought, "This could be more overt. Why don't I make this more overt?"

This is quite a bit different than my other stuff, partially because it's so old, and partially because I was trying to be artistic and thus while erotic, its not exactly as in your face as my other work. I don't even have it listed as 'erotica.' It's filed under fairy tales, and lesbian fiction.

Note: This is a 6,000ish word file. It contains my 3,000 word short story, the poem, and author's notes. It is $0.99

Buy on Amazon
Buy on Amazon UK
Buy on Smashwords

Eliza and Laura grew up together and planned to never be apart. But every seven years the goblins come and offer their fruit, enslaving young maiden's hearts until they waste away, pining for one more taste. Laura falls victim to the goblins, and Eliza must risk everything to save her beloved.

Laura’s mother had nursed Eliza along with her own child, caring for the little girl when her father could not. She took the child home to her family’s cottage and where the two girls grew up almost sisters. Over the years the village seemed to forget the two had ever been anything but.

Both girls grew up well. Both had golden hair and clear blue eyes. Except for a slight freckling across Eliza’s nose, and the fact that Laura was a bit more stout than her companion, they were very much seen as sisters to anyone who met them, and they loved each other more dear than any sisters could.

Laura’s mother saw this when they clung together in bed at nights, even in the summer when a warm breeze blew in through their windows. “It’s high time the two of you were married,” she said the year they turned eighteen. “You’re too old to be sharing a bed like children, when it should be your husbands’ beds you share.”

She had more motive than that for them to be married. That summer was the summer of the Goblin’s Market, as it was every seven years. Before they had been too young to hear the goblin’s call, but they were young women now, and there was nothing a goblin liked more than ripe virgin fruit.

“I don’t want to leave Laura,” Eliza replied.

“And I don’t want to leave Eliza,” Laura added. “There is no man or lad in the village that could tempt me.” Eliza nodded, grasping Laura’s hand to her breast.

“And what about the Goblins?” the older woman prompted. “I was married right fast to your father the fortnight before Midsummer. Poor Jeanie Hinkle was not so lucky.”

“I’ve heard that story,” Laura said, her voice defiant. “I heard she wasted away for want of Goblin fruit."

“Mayhaps she did,” Eliza said, the more timid of the two. She had always been aware that she was an orphan, and to be grateful for her foster mother and always obey. If Mother believed that Goblin fruit poisoned Jeanie Hinkle, Eliza did too.

“She died of consumption, she did,” Laura insisted, and pulled Eliza up to bed.

Once they were settled in their night clothes the two cuddled up together under the sheets. Eliza found Laura’s hand in the darkness. “What if there really are goblins?” she whispered.

“I shall not let them take you, and you shall not let them take me. Isn’t that right?”

Eliza nodded in agreement. She stroked Laura’s hair and kissed her goodnight. “We won’t be separated by goblins, or marriage either.”

“Never,” Laura agreed.

Monday, January 6, 2014

Porn vs Erotica AGAIN

Why do I agonize over this?  I feel like erotica is better than porn, classier, in a way, but at the same time I honestly feel that the only people who worry about being classy are in fact without class. (Then again, I work in fast food and talk about sex on the internet, so clearly I fall into the latter category.) Recently, to make some extra cash, I've started trying to write porn. I say trying, because I'm not very good at it. "Battle of the Dragon Slayer" was supposed to be porn, but the damn thing got too good pretty quickly. Not to say there isn't gallons of dragon cum being sprayed all over the place, but still. (I am trying a second attempt at dragon porn, but the new heroine is still too feisty and prone to plot.)

During Nanowrimo I wrote a lot of porn under various pseudonyms. My concept of writing porn is to be a little silly, a little over the top. "Daddy" step-daughter porn and dinosaur rape--its all ridiculous. I know I'm supposed to be all understanding and "your kink is not my kink and that's okay" but I just can't do it. It's too damn painful.

I started writing some "real porn" and even made the cover before I got too deep into it. Here it is, a perfect copy of the pornos I see in my local sex store.  The photo caters to men, and I was trying to write sexy bimbo lesbians.  Unfortunately for this cover and "Honey Swell" the characters revolted against my fake attempts at man-centric porn.

Things started to get serious, and my pride got the better of me. Bimbos are all well and good if you're a dude, but I am not a dude and I like my erotica women to have some brains (and some balls too, but not in the literal sense). I also respect lesbians too much to write like that. So after Nano I ripped it apart and re-wrote it.  Made a new cover too.

This is smart sex. This is lesbian sex lesbians will read.  It sold 15 copies the first two weeks (which is really good for me).  Not sure how "Truth or Dare Abduction" would have gone over, but Honey's other titles aren't doing so hot. Maybe the readers can tell my heart's not in it. Maybe they do want mental and emotional stimulation after all.

There is a huge market for school girls and lesbians written to entice men and stories where the characters share their measurements with the reader (they have big boobs you know), but I seem to be having a really hard time writing them.  Guess we're not going to see the sequel. Which I also made a cover of. (I like making covers):

"Truth" is available on Amazon.
At her bachelorette party Ginny reveals a secret to her friends: she's always wanted to be kidnapped and ravished by another woman. Jo, a lesbian, just happens to have had a very similar fantasy. Both women are affected when Jo decides to see the fantasy through on the eve of Ginny's wedding.

And there might be a sequel to "Truth." It's called "Lies."

Saturday, January 4, 2014

Dear UK & Germany...

Hello. This is a request for help with price matching.  For quite a few months Drain Me Dry was free on Amazon's UK and Germany sites. Overseas sales were exploding. Or, at the very least, flowing nicely.  Last month, however, the story's price was adjusted back to full price, and my sales have suffered.

The only way I can get the price switched back to free is if several people report a lower price to Amazon. My hands are tied in the matter. (Is this a good time to rant about how Amazon screws itself out of money by screwing me?)

So, if you shop on the .uk or .de and can help, all you have to do is go to the book's page on Amazon and scroll down to the "Tell us about a lower price" in the product details section of the page.  Tell them you can get the book at Smashwords for free.

Here are the pertinent links:

Amazon UK
Amazon  DE


This is a great way to help support someone in need (Me) and give the gift of free gay vampire sex to everyone worldwide, all without paying a cent.  Go on. Give.

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

The 2014 Blog

I work a part time job. I work 10 hours a week for $10 an hour.  I need to work 12.5 hours a week to pay my rent (usually I scrape it together by coming in early, leaving late, and covering for people). When I went into work last night I saw I was only on the schedule for one day (today) in the first week of 2014.  I'm not sure if this is carelessness or animosity on the part of my boss. It could be either--he doesn't really think of his employees as people with needs (like food and shelter) and he really doesn't like me.

I was angry for a good two hours, but finally I sat down and I made a list. It wasn't of other shitty places where I could get a job, or of ways I could get back at him (have already decided--its tuna salad buried deep in the pile of shit he calls an office).

I made a list of 33 projects that I have sitting on my hard drive. Some are just outlines, some are half or even almost entirely finished pieces.  Some are finished works in desperate need of an edit and rewrite. About two-thirds of it is erotica. There are also 3 young adult books (full-length ones), a murder mystery with a talking cat, and a bunch of dark fantasy.  My goal is to finish ALL of these stories.  

All of them.

And I hope, by the end of the year, I wont need to worry about scrambling to cover my rent making shitty sandwiches for an asshole.

So, I need money. For the last 5 months I've been living on about $500 a month.  That covers my rent, utilities, food, and gas. My bike insurance is paid up until July and my phone is paid up until October.  I have $150 a month in student loans that I can't cover. Last year I threw all of my tax money at it so I'm caught up for now, and I'll do the same this year. And I'll keep working at that sandwich shop until the bastard gets up the balls to fire me properly just because I make him uncomfortable (he is a weak man afraid of strong women).

This year you are probably going to see books on here with names other than Leigh Wilder on the cover. They're still me. I'm trying to turn this name into a specific brand of fantasy and paranormal romantica, but I'm writing other stuff as well. When I think it's up to the Leigh Wilder standard of writing (some of it isn't) I'll post it here for you guys to decide if you want it.  All purchases will help me pay my rent and get back at my boss for thinking people like me are worthless.

And this spring I'm going to try to get a job at a garden center, where I can be around green growing things, which make me happy.